Dear Seth,

If you read this know that I tried so so hard. All I wanted was a chance. I guess I'll never really know. Last night was another bad night. Throwing up blood I thought that I was done for, seriously. It was that bad.

Please know that I tried. Know that I'll always love you so damn much Seth. You are one special guy. One day hopefully you'll come to Idaho and visit. It's really beautiful there. You just might like it.

Well I'm out of here. I'll be online soon.

p.s. I love you