Dear Seth,

I think that in some way I messed up with you. God I never meant for this to happen like this. I fell in love and that can never be taken back. Don't regret it one bit either. But tonight if you've read my letter you know where my heart rests. I'll always be grateful to him because he lead me to you. I love him and you too.

In three days time I have my doctors appointment. No one will be there but me. I'm scared beyond belief. There is just too much that in life that I need to do before I go. This can't be it. I fucking refuse it. I'm not trying to be fatalistic, it's the truth, or better yet this is my reality.

At times I wish I was more normal, like main stream America. But then I wouldn't be me. These letters that I write to you are who I am Seth.

Anyways I hope that you had a good day. I can see that there were issues with the server earlier today, but glad that it's figured out at least for the time being. :) In the mean time I learned a lot about HTTP status codes. Some funny as fuck (418 is my favorite) and others I pray to God never happen.

Ok I need to get some kind of sleep. Good night and sweet dreams. Glad that I could make you smile with that challenge about what letters to crushes means to people. Made my day.

p.s. I love you