Dear Seth,

I think that I'm only going to write you here now. It seems better. Today was actually a fucking nightmare. Never have I wanted to talk to you more than today. But I feel like I'm bugging you all the time so it was just a quick email.

God how I wanted to put p.s I love you so bad. It felt so fucking natural. Like it should be there but I didn't.

What you've told me has put me into a spin. And it hurts. It's like a blow to the stomach. I wish that you would get that I'm not in love with you just because of who you are. And I wish so damn much about everything. But I'm not giving hope. Even if I'm an old lady I will always love you. I will never have another partner because you are the last person that I'll love. My heart will always be yours.

Ok I'm going to let you go for now. I wonder if you honestly read my blog? That would be cool and interesting to say the least.

Good night and sweet dreams. Oh lol before I go please one last request. Don't get up at fucking 5 am ish your time again. Cause for the past 2 freaking nights/early mornings I have woke up at 3 am. Ugh and I mean out of a deep sleep too.

p.s. I love you