Tonight I can't even write your name. It hurts. I'm grasping for straws and only coming up short. This is worse than when I lost Marc. Because you're here and I feel so damn fucking hopeless like I can't do anything. Today was actually beyond harsh it was brutal. But they'll never know. I know that I won't get any sleep. So I'll try and work on that project for you. It's the only thing that I can do to show you that I love you more than my life even. Why is life so damn unfair? Please try and get some sleep. And dream something beautiful. Damn this fucking sucks. Good night.

p.s. I love you